Every Office has a Water Cooler

Politics by the Watering Hole photo credit

DAY 3 as a Christmas Tree Salesman

So I am learning that even in the Christmas tree slanging game, there is still no way to avoid office politics. I am only going into my third day and already co-workers are conniving and gossiping about each other. Christmas tree salesman, despite being men of poverty character, are not immune from our basic human need to make on another miserable during the holidays.

Me: Hey have you seen Mark by chance? I have to ask him about the schedule.

Vernon: I try not to think about Mark – ever, but I suppose he is unavoidable in my life. That guy is a (explicit) and (explicit).

Me: Ok. Well I just want to know if I am working tomorrow, so… Cool. (awkward silence).

Later that day…

Mark: Just so you know, the only people you should be listening to are Tyler and I. Anyone wearing yellow pants and a red sweater is not to be listened to, taken seriously, or even trusted.

Me: Oh really? Who is wearing a red sweater? Oh that Vern guy. Interesting…he seemed to know what he was doing to me.

Mark: Well he doesn’t and thinks he is running the show. And it looks like we will be doing some more employee pruning around here. But keep that under your hat.

Me: Getting rid of more employees huh? You have been on a real firing spree as of late.

Mark: Yeah. I got rid of 4 within the first week.

Me: Why?

Mark: Just general laziness, incompetence, or people who start talking like they own the place. Keep staying focused and listen to instructions and you can go far here. You’ve got a lotta potential.

Me: Great.

Things are looking up. My third day and I haven’t stepped on too many toes or alerted anyone to my complete lack of labor skills. I am on the team riding in the fastlane. And on an interesting side note, I can feel myself developing bear-like strength.

My Bear-like Strength

Turner barr
turnerbarr@gmail.com

Hi, my name is Turner. I travel the world, hustle to find interesting jobs, and write about what happens when you read too many self-help books.

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